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I was not feeling as though I wanted her back...after listening to her tell me how wonderfull her new love/my former z friend is...I was feeling quite depressed and nascious. not, because I want her back but becauseI just did not want to hear all that about them...I reached a saturation point....I wish them both the best, and perhaps they will find the happiness that was elusive to us in the end. I am much happier now, single 21...and out ot have some fun with my life. What I was really depressed was how the dynamic of our group has so drasticly changed that it makes things awkward. We used to be a good group I would go with my fiance and my friends would bring their gf's...now its like a rift..as one of those friends is with my ex..creates weird tensions, and I liked the simplicity of the old situation better...on the upswing to that however is the fact I'm not tied down and can date several girls... :) Hence, the bigpimpin in TPA. I allowed her kind yet semi depressing words this morining lull me into a state of remorse or something...particualarly foolish in light of what was done to me...so I just wanted to clarify that I did not want her back, rather I was longing for the solidarity of the past, and was tired of having to deal with friends in such a split manner.
 
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08:13:29 05/01/01
